I AM SUPER DUPER EXCITED ABOUT N.E.R.D'S LATEST LP SEEING SOUNDS SCHEDULED TO DROP NEXT MONTH. TAKING A THE ROAD LESS TRAVELED AND LEAVING THE CLUB BANGERS TO THE OTHER KIDS, N.E.R.D IS GIVING THIS LP A MORE EURO LAYERED VIBE THAT THEIR FANS CAN ROCK OUT TO. EXPECT "A BIG ALBUM OF LSD, SONIC DRUG." SAYS BAND MEMBER CHAD HUGO IN AN INTERVIEW WITH MTV.
LAST NIGHT I ATTENDED A WONDERFUL SHOWCASE OF TALENT AT THE HIGH LINE BALLROOM HOSTED BY SEAN "DIDDY" COMBS. THE NIGHT'S SHINING STAR WAS JANELLE MONAE. HIGHLY ENERGETIC, MONAE IS THE EPITOME OF A ROCK STAR, ACTING OUT STUNTS LIKE SLIDING ACROSS ONE SIDE OF THE DANCE FLOOR JUST TO MOONWALK HER WAY BACK TO THE MIC. DIDDY SAID WE WERE STARVING FOR A NEW ARTIST LIKE HER, AND HE WASN'T LYING. HER PERFORMANCE WAS MORE THAN FULFILLING.
AS USUAL, DIDDY MANAGED TO STEAL THE SPOT LIGHT, BUT THIS TIME IT WAS NOT ON PURPOSE. I JUST GOT SO DISTRACTED WITH HIM WINDING HIS WAIST, AND MAKING LOVE IN THE CLUB [TO HIMSELF] THAT I HAD TO REDIRECT MY ATTENTION HIS WAY.
SHORTLY THEREAFTER I ACCUSED HIM OF NEVER CALLING ME, AND GOT A GROWN MAN CHUCKLE IN EXCHANGE.
IF YOU THOUGHT THINGS COULDN'T GET ANY SPOOKIER THAN S. KING'S THE SHINING, YOU HAVEN'T CHECKED INTO THE STOLI HOTEL.
EVERY YEAR STOLI TRAVELS THE US [WELL NEW YORK, MIAMI, CHICAGO, AND HOLLYWOOD] TO SET UP THEIR POPULAR STOLI HOTELS THAT BECOME A NON-STOP-ALL-YOU-CAN-DRINK PARTY FOR 10 DAYS STRAIGHT.
IN NEW YORK, THINGS KICKED OFF MAY 7TH WITH THE GRAND OPENING HOSTED BY DJ VICE, FOLLOWED BY EVENTS HOSTED BY THE ROLLING STONES, VANITY FAIR, HOUSE OF DIEHL, TRADE NIGHT, AND LAST NIGHT'S GQ MAGAZINE TO CELEBRATE ROBERT DOWNEY JR'S AMAZING COVER.
EVERYONE IN THE PLACE SEEMED TO BE OVERLY SELF IMPORTANT, FLASHING BUSINESS CARDS, AND GREASY SMILES, AND RANTING ABOUT HOW THEY WERE "SOMEBODY IMPORTANT... JUST YOU WAIT AND SEE!". IN ATTENDANCE WERE THOSE SMALL TIME WAITING TO BLOW ARTISTS, AND STARVING MODELS. THERE WAS EVEN A SIGHTING OF THE "BLACK SOCIALITE." [SO I'M GOING TO COME OUT AND SAY IT. SHE TOTALLY STOLE B. WOMACK'S TITLE ON THAT ONE!]
EVERYONE WAS ENJOYING THEMSELVES, BUT THERE WAS SOMETHING VERY EERIE ABOUT THE WHOLE THING. ALL NIGHT I WAS APPROACHED BY STRANGE PEOPLE MAKING THE ODDEST REFERENCES TO PLACING CONDIMENTS INSIDE OF BODIES, TOUCHING CHINS, RIPPING OLD FRIENDS A NEW ONE, FLYING TO STRANGE PLACES, ALL HUMANS COMING FROM THE SAME SEA, CAPTAIN CRUNCH HATS, AND PLASTIC BLAZERS. I FELT AS IF I WERE IN THE HOTEL CALIFORNIA INSTEAD OF THE STOLI HOTEL, AND I WASN'T SURE IF I WAS ALLOWED TO CHECK OUT. WHATEVER WAS IN THOSE DRINKS COULDN'T HAVE POSSIBLY BEEN JUST VODKA!
AS I'M SITTING THERE SOAKING THIS ALL IN, A THOUGHT OF MY BROTHER POPPED INTO MY HEAD AND I COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING. I REMEMBER WATCHING THE NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD WITH HIM, AND HIM CONCLUDING THAT IF YOU'RE EVER SURROUNDED BY ZOMBIES TO JUST ACT LIKE YOU'RE A ZOMBIE UNTIL YOU CAN MAKE A RUN FOR IT. SO THAT'S WHAT I DID. I PUT ON THE CRAZY FACE, AND STARTED MAKING ODD COMMENTS TO RANDOM PEOPLE UNTIL I WAS ABLE TO SEE THE EXIT AND DASH OUT OF THE DOOR.
NOT TO WORRY THOUGH, THE FUN ISN'T OVER JUST YET, THE VACANT SIGN WILL STILL BE BLINKING UNTIL THE 17TH.
DOES ANYONE CARE THAT REMY MA IS GETTING 8 YEARS IN PRISON, AND HER BOO, RAPPER PAPOOSE, IS BANNED FROM SEEING HER FOR 6 MONTHS BECAUSE HE TRIED TO SMUGGLE HER A HANDCUFF KEY? OR DO YOU CARE THAT LIL WAYNE IS GOING BACK TO TRIAL TODAY FOR POSSESSION OF 29 GRAMS OF COCAINE FROM BACK IN JANUARY IN THE STATE OF ARIZONA (FOR WHICH HE IS TRYING TO SAY HE ONLY HAD 8 GRAMS...DUDE YOU STILL HAD COCAINE!)? HOW ABOUT THIS, DO YOU CARE THAT OJ SIMPSON GOT HIGH ONE NIGHT AT CONFESSED TO KILLING HIS WIFE, THEN GOT SNITCHED ON? NO? WELL WHAT ABOUT THE FACT THAT JAY-Z'S ILLEGITIMATE RAS-CLOT YOUTH SCANDAL IS RESURFACING RIGHT AFTER HIM AND HIS MISSES TIED THE KNOT? I MEAN, I CAN GO ON. THERE IS AN UPDATE ON THE R. KELLY TRIAL I HAVEN'T MENTIONED, OR THE GLORIFIED T.I. GUN CHARGES IN THE NEWS LATELY, OH YEA AND THE PICS ON THE INTERNET OF SUGE KNIGHT GETTING KNOCKED THE F*** OUT!
I ASKED FOR SOME TYPE OF RESPONSE AS TO WHAT'S GOING ON IN THE WORLD TODAY AND THIS WAS THE RESPONSE I GOT:
Me:"So.. Do you understand that what you guys are doing is absolutely ludicrous, and I'm not talking about the rapper.."
Confused Black America: "Yes, but I wanted to do hood rat stuff with my friends."
Me: "You don't think you should be punished for all of this?"
Confused Black America: "Just a little bit — no video games for a whole weekend."
WORD ON THE STREET IS MEKKA DON HAS DONE IT AGAIN! JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT IT WAS ALREADY "BROUGHTEN," AND YOU GOT SERVED, HE MANAGED TO SOCK IT TO YA ONE MORE TIME.
YEA YEA I KNOW IT'S MONDAY, BUT WEEKENDS ARE RELATIVE, AND IN MY OWN MIND IT'S STILL THE WEEKEND. SO HERE'S YOUR ROUND-UP...
IN FAVOR OF ALL THINGS DIFFERENT, IN A VERY REMINISCENT FAMILIAR WAY, HERE'S ANOTHER ONE YOU CAN ADD TO YOUR RAINY DAY CD COLLECTION. NOT NECESSARILY BIRTHED AT THE BOTTOM OF THE MAP, BUT DEFINITELY RAISED AT THE TOP, IS "SOUL"TRY ACOUSTIC R&B ARTIST JUSTIN NOZUKA. BORN IN QUEENS, SIXTH OF SEVEN CHILDREN, JUSTIN WAS MOVED TO TORONTO AT AN EARLY AGE WHERE HE TOOK A KEEN INTEREST IN HOCKEY, AND SAW HIMSELF MAKING A CAREER OUT OF IT UNTIL HIS LOVE FOR MUSIC GOT TOO LOUD FOR HIM TO IGNORE.
WHILE STILL IN HIGH SCHOOL, JUSTIN DECIDED TO HIRE PRODUCER BILL BELL, SANS A RECORDING COMPANY, TO HELP HIM PRODUCE HIS DEBUT ALBUM NAMED AFTER HIS MOTHER, HOLLY. WITH A SOUND MUCH OLDER AND FAR MORE MATURE THAN YOU WOULD EXPECT FROM SUCH A YOUNG GUY, IT'S NO WONDER IN SUCH A SHORT TIME SPAN JUSTIN HAS ALREADY SHARED THE STAGE WITH GREATS LIKE ZIGGY MARLEY, JOHN CALE, AND SAM ROBERTS.
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